triple crown: the stakes

part two of three on public transportation in mongolia. Look here for part one.

the preakness stakes:

eeny meeny miney moe
catch a tiger by its toe
if it hollers let it go
eeny meeny miney moe

Standing at a bus stop in UB is really like playing an elaborate, life-sized, adult version of eeny meeny miney moe.

different color buses, with different names, different numbers and different route maps.

Sometimes, just for additional fun, they have none of these identifying markers- they are just big old buses that pull up to the curb and open their doors.

There is no consistent pattern that I've been able to discern- no code of which color bus goes where or how you're supposed to know where they go.

Sometimes they have a map of their route on the side and this can give you some idea of what direction it's headed or where it will stop. And if it has a name you can possibly figure out which district (UB is divided up into numerical districts) it is headed.

Not being familiar with most Mongolian names/districts/neighborhoods- choosing what bus to ride becomes a game.

eeny meeny miney moe
where will this one go?

Holli and I make it a general rule to not get on any buses that don't have route maps, for there is too much uncertainty as to where they are actually going.

At first we thought this game of "pick a bus and see if it goes where you want it to" was the result of us having just moved here and not knowing how things worked.

Then we discovered that this is in fact how most people operate when it comes to the bus system- guessing, hoping and getting off on the next stop if the bus starts heading in the wrong direction.

eeny meeny miney moe is normal.

Once your bus of choice has ushered you on, sometimes still moving as you climb on, there are a few things it is good to know when playing (riding) the bus (game).

First, there is no such thing as an overcrowded bus. I blame this rule on the buses' smaller, although not less esteemed cousin the micro and its ever-expanding desire to cram in as many people as possible. Or maybe the buses first set a bad example for the micros. Either way, you can expect that people will just keep cramming onto the bus even when you're not sure it's humanly possible.

Second, distance does not determine fare. Everyone pays 300 tg unless you happen to ride one of the older, more likely to fall apart buses- in which case you get a discounted rate of 200 tg. Each bus has a money collector who walks through the bus collecting fare from the new passengers.

Third, public transportation is a largely silent affair in UB. It's not at all abnormal to be on a full bus and for it to be completely silent- no talking, no conversations, just silence. Sometimes this is nice. And sometimes it makes me wish for talking to fill the silence.

Fourth, when all seats are taken and an elderly man or woman gets on the bus, anyone younger than them should get up and offer them their seat. I tend to avoid sitting down because then I don't have to mentally debate who qualifies as elderly and whether or not I'm unintentionally being offensive by remaining seated.

Fifth, riding the bus is a test of a person's balance. Traffic and driving in general being what it is here in UB, drivers love to hit the brakes in the most abrupt fashion known to mankind. If you don't brace yourself you will go flying into the people standing next to you. And then you will have to apologize as you get flung black in the opposite direction because the driver just tried to avoid hitting the car that just cut in front of your bus.

Sixth, negative degree temperatures outside and heating inside the buses means the windows are always iced over. This makes knowing when to get off challenging, for the only way to know where you are is to look out said ice-covered windows. This hurdle can be handled in a variety of fashions- some scratch little spots in the windows so they can see, some maneuver to get a glimpse out the front of the bus and others just wait until the doors open to determine whether they should hustle out into the cold or not.

And last but not least, if the bus doesn't stop where you want it to, don't panic. Just get off at the next stop and walk back to the place you had wanted to be. Riding the bus ensures you won't get frostbite walking an hour to get to the store. It does not ensure direct, timely or uninterrupted transportation :-)

Welcome to bus riding in UB, where there are enough unwritten guidelines to make up for the guessing game that is figuring out which one to get on at any given time.

eeny meeny miney moe
can you figure out how to go?